According to human psychology, there are six negative expressions that prevent humans from happiness and health. They are lust, anger, greed, attachment, pride, and jealousy. Let us tackle one of the common negative expressions in life, that is, losing control of your emotions. If you follow the simple tips to control anger, given in this article, you can stay in bliss and the best of health.
WHY DO YOU BECOME ANGRY?
Usually, the majority of anger situations happens because of negative thoughts. It has not happened my way or it should not have been the other way. Your life is usually based on the personal set of ideas, likes, values, beliefs, and assumptions. The way a work should happen. How you expect people to treat your ‘self’. And how others should exhibit their behavior before your presence. You tend to believe life-based on your experiences.
The ultimate factor is every human wants to remain happy. Have you heard the famous proverb – Birds of the same feather flock together? Even in offices, you can come across two groups of people – the smokers. They will all combine in the smoking zone. And the non-smokers – you can find them at the canteen munching pizzas or any snack. It is just that, as a human, you like to remain the company of others who view the world like to yours. You tend to favor your ego when you mix with like-minded individuals.
In other words, you believe that the rules, ideas, values, and beliefs you set are correct. No questions asked, no answers given. But when you have to work with a person with a different opinion regarding the values and beliefs, that is when anger sets in. In short, it will be a very uncomfortable environment. But, following the simple tips to control anger in this article will make the environment calm and comfortable.
BEFORE YOU GET ANGRY
Anger does not come to an adult in a jiffy. Forget about children, they become angry when not given their favorite toy. But as an adult, before anger steps in, frustration will be the first point. You believe that your rules and opinion are right. The other individual should follow your way. In short, you want to change the other person. So, you are forcing the other individual to do the action which he/she thinks is wrong.
As per the law of human nature, an opinion towards any activity is never right or wrong. It is just a reflection of the character. While you feel happy to live life in your way, the others also have a right to live their own as per their beliefs. Learning to understand that even your ‘enemy’ (you believe he is) also has the right to live life as per his own terms is the biggest lesson in life. But what do you do? When the work is not completed as per your plan, then you tend to get frustrated. It leads to anger and you lose the sense of control over your feelings. So, what do you have to do to regain your positive emotions? Kindly read the simple tips to control anger at one shot and it may change your life forever.
1. Recognize
First, recognize that you are not happy with a situation. Work has not happened as planned. If someone has followed/is following another set of rules, it is not personal. They want to follow their own rules. You cannot handle another person’s thoughts, but you can, definitely change the way to respond. Correct? So respond positively, and in a convincing manner. So focus on how to do the action in a different way, instead of focusing on the wrong-doings of the other person.
Feeling Angry or disturbed. We have come with the best simple methods to respond to anger only for you.
Step 1 – I have become angry because of the reason that _________________ ___ should not have ________________ ___________.
Step 2 – I will feel glad if _____________________________________________.
Step 3 – I can respond in this particular method – __________________________.
Your parent has shouted at you in front of the family.
Step 1: I have gone mad as my father should not have raised his voice in front of others.
Step 2: I will be glad if he can give more respect to me in front of others. He should treat me/speak to me with respect.
Step 3: The best way to respond is – I can request him to speak in a soft voice after he has regained his composure. I can also choose to remain silent when he raises his voice.
You Have Not Got A Good Performance Appraisal At Work
Step 1 – You have become angry because the co-worker has got a good raise. You are an older employee, but still, she has ……The list never ends.
Step 2 – If only raises were not given according to performances.
Step 3 – I can request a performance review and find out where I lack so as to get the next best raise. If I am subdued, because of dirty office politics, then I can search for my talent in other companies.
As a human being, recognize that it is never wrong to feel depressed if the work has not happened in your own way. If they don’t, empower your mind to make the environment better. Do not feel miserable stating everyone else should play by the rule.
2. Think Before You Blurt The Words Out
Do you become angry, when someone does not follow the traffic rules? Do you feel the blood pressure rises high when your child answers back? The first aspect to understand, anger is a normal emotion of humans and even animals. But you can respond in a way that is favorable not only to others but also yourself.
Uncontrolled anger will make you blurt unnecessary words to spoil your health. This nature can also wreak havoc on long-lasting relationships.
No, that is not the end of the road. After you said the words, when you regain composure, you will regret for a lifetime. So, be careful with the words, collect your thoughts and then respond, not react.
3. Exercise
In this era of fast-paced life, you work regularly and the body is devoid of any physical activity. So, stress builds up and very soon, it will lead to negative expressions. Exercise produces sweat and excretes the toxins from your body. It also eradicates negative expressions such as anger. You stay calm and relaxed to deal with any situation.
4. Do Not Hold Grudges
Forgiveness is the best prayer you can offer to GOD. Anger with revenge is like a burning matchstick in a haystack. First, it will burn you and then the entire haystack. Human life is for happiness and not to suffer from negative emotions.
5. Use Humor
Lightening up the environment can diffuse any strained atmosphere. There are many popular CEO’s who use humor to convey their displeasure in a convincing way. See, if you can master the ART. At the same time, do not try unwise humor on others or you will make enemies for life.
6. Relaxation Skills
In temper, the best form is relaxation. You can use the deep breathing exercises. This method works well in office conditions. In your home, you can listen to soothing music, repeat a calming statement such as “take it easy.”
When you become angry, the body becomes tense and muscles get contracted. Breathing slowly makes the muscles relaxed. What do you do when you become angry? You clench the fists, you sweat or face an abnormality in breathing. To ensure that you do not display the symptom, practice deep breathing exercises.
7. Professional Help
Are you facing challenges to control anger? Seek help if you feel not confident to deal with the negative symptom yourself. You can ask for reliable help from psychologists etc.
8. Empathy
Some say that sympathy is the best form of humanitarian nature. A wise Chinese monk has stated, “It is not sympathy, but empathy which can win even the enemies’ heart.” True to the alphabet. Empathy means you step in the other person’s shoes and brain to understand, feel in his/her own way. Visualizing is an important method to feel empathy. Try this technique when every activity is going negative and you will never feel sorry.
9. Every Soul Is Right
Understand the basic facts of human life. The soul is always PURE. It is beliefs, values, and actions that make a soul in a human body look EVIL. Many humans act in a particular way because they feel their actions are right. They do not mean any harm or challenge your authority. And there are some persons who do not know the consequences of their actions on others. This is the TRUTH. Every human wants to live a life meaningful as per their conscience. When you understand the logic, you will never become angry.
Conclusion
Have you read Sherlock Holmes detective novels by Arthur Conan Doyle? Or the Famous Five? Track the clues which make you angry. After you identified them, try not to become angry in similar situations.
So, the very next time, you feel eyes have become red, the ears are letting out volcanic fumes; do not forget to remember the points written in this article of simple tips for controlling anger. You will become calm without a complaint. Best of Luck!
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